Keeping Up With The Boys!

Lilypie

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Almost 1/3rd Of The Way There

I cannot believe that we are almost 1/3rd of the way to 1 year old. On Thursday, the boys will officially be 4 months old. It just seems so crazy. Time is flying and as they continue to develop their wonderful personalities, time flies even faster.
The boys went on their first trip to the Zoo this past Sunday. They enjoyed some things, but for the most part, they were too little to get really excited. I think in about 4 more months, they will love the zoo and it will be cooler and we also won't have to deal with as many tourists. It is best to visit the Zoo when it is cooler. All the animals are out playing because it isn't 100 degrees outside and the Zoo isn't packed full of spectators.
The boys seemed to really like the monkeys and the bears. The bears were especially cool because there was one bear that was a real show-off. That Grizzly was pacing and bobbing his head. Then the other bear was just lounging in the water. It was really funny. Those Grizzlies had my cubs completely enthralled.
Also, when we left, we got a nice family portrait in front of the seal fountains. Although, I got a picture of just the boys and Matt and I love that picture more. I'm just not happy with my photo being taken yet, and I love having a picture of the 3 most important men in my life, laughing and having a good time.
After the Zoo, Matt and I went to Casa for lunch. There was a much older lady having a birthday party and we got seated right next to them. All their party loved talking to the boys. James was being a total flirt and had them all cracking up. Ethan was also flashing the occasional smile and getting their attention too. I absolutely love it when people say how cute my babies are. Before having children, it was always great to get a compliment, but now, I just revel in people praising my babies. They are smart, cute, and loving little baby bears. Who wouldn't love these guys.
I will add pictures to the blog later tonight.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

More to Love: Screw Off

http://www.fox.com/moretolove/

It hasn't premiered yet, but the previews piss me off so much. You see a bunch of overweight women crying because they can't find love, because they are fat. Then they show a large man and you realize, this is The Bachelor for FAT PEOPLE.
This whole premise just disturbs me. These women don't need to compete for the affection of one big guy and get voted off one by one when they obviously have self esteem issues regarding their weight. As if large women only have this one shot for love and if the big guy doesn't want them, their shot for love is over?
I don't like that it makes it seem like bigger women could only be loved by a fat guy. I think the previews for this show come off so vain, just not in the way we are normally exposed to it. I know they are trying to put up this message that you can find love no matter what size you are, but I really think it broadcasts the message, You can find love, but if you are obese, you better only try to date another obese person. This only intensifies the network television staple, love is completely shallow.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Yesterday was So Rough

Work was super busy, so when I got home, I was thrilled. I have pictures to organize in albums and get put in frames. I had a plan. Well, I get a call from my Mom who asks if I talked to Matt yet? I said "No"
She said that he knows the whole story of why she is really upset. I asked what was wrong, and she dished her story.
My Mom took the boys to Wal-Mart yesterday and she ran into one of her old co-workers who was excited to see the babies. This co-worker was oogling Ethan, and only Ethan. Ethan was eating up the attention and acting quite charming, and this made James upset. He started pushing out the booboo lip and he cried. My Mom was kinda mad at the friend for only paying attention and complimenting the one baby, so when my Mom walked off with the boys, she cuddled James and told him how beautiful he is too.
A bit later in the trip, my 12 year old sister was pushing the boy's stroller and she got a bit ahead of my Mom. My sister was startled when an older man came up behind her and grabbed her arm. My sister screamed and My Mom ran up to her. The man was trying to stop her so he could see the twins. He was there with his wife.
The man pointed at Ethan and said, "Oh, he's the cute one." My Mom and Mads said, "They are both cute." The Man's wife said, "Oh, they are precious little boys." Then the man points at James and said, "That is a girl." My Mom said "No, He's a boy." The man, still pointing said, "Why doesn't that one have hair?" My Mom pushed Mads to keep walking and they just left. My sister was upset and started crying, aside from feeling like James was insulted, when the man grabbed her arm, she was frightened. She said she thought that someone was trying to abduct her and the boys. The whole trip was so upsetting.
My Mom told me that when the boys get home, give James a little extra love. It is so hard having twins. When one baby has a rough day, you want to give him all the extra love and attention to make up for it, but all that extra love comes at the cost of not spending equal time with your other baby. Having twins this age is so difficult, you are constantly monitoring yourself to make sure you don't accidentally play favorites. I love my boys the same, I'd give anything for either of them. And I'd give anything for an extra set of arms so I could hold both my babies at the same time and love on them simultaneously (without annoying them with the split attention). I hope when they get older and they can play more with each other, it will be easier to spend time with the 2 of them instead of one at a time.
After talking to my Mom, Matt called me. I started to tell him that I had just talked to my Mom, when he said, "Call her back and tell her to come get the boys." I was stunned. I just said "What?" He said, I was rearended and the boys are hysterical." Just then, his phone dies.
So all I know at this point was that the 3 most important people in my life were in a car accident and that the boys were crying hysterically. Matt's phone was going straight to Voicemail, so I called my Mom and told her to go get the boys, but I couldn't tell her where he was, just to follow his route home.
I was a nervous wreck. I started bawling. I was worried about the boys, about Matt, about the car, about the carseats. I was rearended when I was 6 weeks pregnant in that car. That car was good as new and now it has been in 2 accidents, and both technically had my precious babies in the car.
I got a call a little bit later from my Dad who got to them first. He told me everything was okay and everyone was alright. I found out that an F250 wasn't paying attention and while my husband was waiting to merge right onto the highway, the truck slammed into the back of them.
Matt said the driver is young, only about 18. Matt said he thinks he was a kid driving his Dad's truck. He slammed his F250 into our little Cobalt. Matt had called the cops before he called me and 911 said they would send someone. After 20 minutes of waiting, the cops called and said they would not be coming and to just exchange information. I did not like that at all. Why do we pay taxes if the police can't help us in our time of need?
Anyway, the guy had liability only on a newer $40,000 truck. I think that seems kinda weird. And the insurance company was one I never heard of, but it was valid, we made sure to check.
So everyone was okay, thank God! The boys were in hysterics because they were napping when the car was hit. It scared them pretty bad, but after a few minutes, they had calmed down and went to sleep.
So that night, I wanted to cuddle James extra because of the Wal-Mart incident, but my heart strings were pulling me to Ethan too. Both my babies had a traumatic day. They were both in their first car accident since being out of the womb.
Oh, and the car is drivable, but I hate dealing with insurance. I know it was an accident, but this is such horrible timing for us. We are still waiting for our tax refund that the IRS lost and we have had tons of medical bills to pay off from having the boys. I don't want to have to pay our deductible and wait for Young insurance company to reimburse us. We are purging money and the over $8,000 the government owes us is taking months to get. They lost our first refund papers. This has been ridiculous.

Friday, June 12, 2009

Lady Gaga: Ga, Ga, Ga, Got Your Nose!

I play "Got Your Nose" with the boys a lot. They always love it when I just tap on the end of their nose. Last night while watching SYTYCD, I was playing with the boys and I hear "Pokerface" playing in the background. I don't love the song, but I've heard it a million times. While I was tapping their noses, I came up with something downright goofy and brilliant. So as I tap a nose, the words came so natural, "I,P,P, Poked your face, Ma,Ma, Poked your face." They think I'm hilarious! Heck, I am hilarious!
And Matt rolls his eyes at my jokes and says, "Oh Mandy."

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Too Cool For School

I was at Walgreens picking up some prints and they had the cutest little sunglasses. Only to my surprise, they are not just cute on my boys, they are Super-Cool! I love the little spidey shades!
James
Ethan

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

This Sign Rubs Me The Wrong Way

"Tour this home through the mind of a woman"
I hate that sign. It is right off the highway and I see it everyday on my way to and from work. Seriously, are women's brains so profoundly different that they have to put this slightly insulting saying on a giant billboard? I pointed the sign out to my husband the other day and he said it really bothered him, like touring a house with his own ideas were somewhat inferior. I saw right away that we were upset for different reasons.

I decided to look into this further just to see if what they are talking about would tick me off. Guess what, it kinda did. The whole idea behind it is women-centric homebuilding. There is more lighting and more cabinet space. I'm not sure why that is intrinsicly a female need, to want to be able to see and put things away, but apparently, someone thinks it is feminine to have more space for the groceries. Lets not even get started on the concept of Woman's Work!

The thing that bugged me most was how they boast that there is a tiny corner of counter and an extra cabinet in the bathroom. I thought, yeah, for towels, Right? Storage? They said that because women are so busy with maintaining a home, she can use this space to make her a pot of coffee while she showers and does her hair and makeup in the mornings. I thought, "Oh how great, we can't even escape cooking in the bathroom." Also, making any kind of food or beverage in the bathroom is disgusting. That is like saying, lets plug in a toaster and we can just sit it on top of the toilet tank. That way, we can make a full breakfast all without standing up from the can. Making your coffee in your home bathroom, isn't that a little bit Motel 6ish?

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Yay, Finally Some Progress

I didn't go out to lunch today. I ordered pictures online so I can finally start filling my albums. And I made my appointment at the dermatologist! I have a huge list of things I have to do this week and I really want to get it all done. So excuse me for being boring, I am making my to do list:
  • Film Project Spotlight at work.
  • Mop the kitchen.
  • Dust the bedrooms.
  • Clean and scrub both bathrooms.
  • Vacuum.
  • Wash the windows.
  • Take the boys for a walk each night this week (weather permitting)
  • Buy Matt's Father's Day Gift.
  • Check on where the Hell my tax refund is.
  • Buy a card for neighbor's son's graduation party.
  • Upload rest of memory stick to Walgreens so I can order more prints.
  • Finish securing the diaper cake I made over the weekend.
  • Download all pictures from my memory stick to Matt's new Hard drive.
  • Burn all those pictures to a DVD.
  • Delete pictures off the memory stick and start taking more pictures of the boys.
  • Video tape how adorable their personalities have become.
  • Play Wii Active a couple nights this week.
  • Pic up my 10x13s and picture CD at Olan Mills.
  • Find time for a nap.

Tinea Versicolor and Other Things Wrong With My Body

I have something called Tinea Versicolor. It is a very annoying skin condition that is basically, a yeast infection of the skin. I had this once before from swimming in Tablerock Lake. I was diagnosed first by my primary care physician who told me that I should put some Lotrimin on it. The stuff would not clear up and Lotrimin was darn expensive to keep slathering over such a large area of skin. It looks like super light white dots all over my shoulders, chest, arm pits, and upper abs. I asked my doctor if there was anything else. She told me to keep slathering on that Lotrimin.
When Matt proposed to me, I decided that I needed to see a dermatologist because there was no way I was going to walk down the aisle spotted. So I saw the dermatologist and he gave me some kind of oral medication. I took 4 pills and my spots were gone. It was so fast. I had those spots for over a year, and they were gone in a flash!
Fast forward to having my babies. I have it again. I'm sure the wacky hormones and the hospital not letting me shower for a couple days had something to do with it. It is horrible. I wish a dermatologist could just take my word for it and call me in a prescription. I have been spotted for a few months now and it is really annoying. I have been wanting to get this taken care of for awhile now, but I have such a scattered Mommy brain, I don't really take very good care of myself, so I keep forgetting to call my doctor for a referral. Plus, there is a part of me that doesn't want to find the time to see a dermatologist, or pay the co-pay for a specialist.
And speaking of not taking care of myself when I should, I have had such a massive drop in energy lately. I virtually stopped exercising. I eat horribly, and I am really hating the way I look. I have got to get it together. I just haven't had the energy to power through a workout.
The boys are awake so much more now and they are always wanting attention. It just drains me. There is never a night that I don't pass out the second my head hits my pillow. I need to start taking more naps. I think that would help me with this problem. I have got to lose some more of this weight. I had lost so much, and now I'm terrified to step on a scale to see how much I've gained back. I am using this blog post as my motivation. Today, I will make my dermatologist appt, then later on, I will take the boys for a walk and do Wii Active. Afterall, if I'm going to wear a swimsuit this year, I need to lose some more weight and get my skin tannable.

Formula Annoyances

The boys take Similac Sensitive. We used to get enough of it for free from the Doctor's office, but now, the boys eat so much, we find ourselves buying formula all the time. I really like the similac in the plastic tubs. It is silkier than the kind that comes in the can. It just seems so much fresher and I think it mixes better in the bottles.
Anyway, the Walgreens by my house has the kind of Similac that we use about 50% of the time. When they do have it, and I go to check out, I get tons of Good Start coupons! I hate that. You would think a company that makes baby formula knows that they will not get customers by giving Moms a lousy coupon to switch their babies' diets and possibly cause the babies stomach discomfort. It is just so annoying. I hate all the good start coupons.

Monday, June 8, 2009

The Television

The television is our friend. I swear, we try not to have it on, but the boys love when it is. They are mesmerized by it. It is the only thing they want to look at.

If Matt and I are in the living room with the TV on, Ethan will arch his back and twist his neck as much as he can to get the best view of the TV. They would watch anything. The even seem interested in C-SPAN, Go figure.


It has gotten to where if they cry and cry, the best thing for us to do, is pull up Elmo's Song on YouTube. Ethan and James both love listening and watching. I have 2 Sesame Street Fanatics! Matt and I love that. There is no better show than Sesame Street. Matt and I still like to watch it. Although, it worries me that the boys like watching TV so much. We are going to have to limit this.


Here is their absolute favorite video in the world:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rpas0QjKY_A&feature=fvw

I Made a Diaper Cake!

I've always wanted to make one of these. I had most of the stuff to do it already. I just used the tons of diapers that the boys have grown out of. Then I bought a few bibs, a few washcloths, some bath toys, a couple bottles, and a stuffed animal. It was super easy to put together. I'm really proud of my first effort. Matt's co-worker had a baby boy on Friday and I wanted to do something nice.









Thursday, June 4, 2009

I Want To Go See A Movie

I need a babysitter, bad. I need to go out and see a movie or I'm going to get cabin fever. I get so excited at the prospect of watering my yard while Matt watches the boys. I get to be outdoors and by myself. It is nice. I don't care that I get covered in mud, bitten by mosquitos, and get sprayed with the sprinkler, yardwork has become my vacation.
I love my little boys, but sometimes after a long day, I feel like I just want a moment alone. I know I chose this for my life and I have no right to complain, but I wish I had the ability to go out maybe once a month, or once every other month. during my pregnancy, I didn't get to enjoy a meal out for 9 months because I could never keep any food down. Now I am just not able to with the little ones.
I get to go to a baseball game tonight. I jumped at the opportunity. I'm happy to be able to get out of the house, but at the same time, I think Matt and I would rather go out to a dinner where we weren't on pins and needles trying to curb a crying baby/babies or running through drive-thru, but this wasn't our choice. I think a movie would have been nice because there are so many movies we want to see. Plus, there isn't a ton of walking involved and we won't have to worry about the weather. Matt and I are suffering from exhaustion. I know it isn't fair to be tired, when my Mom watches them during the day. I really can't say I'm tired around her because it would be selfish.
If I could be a stay at home Mom, I really would.
It is so hard to wake up, get ready for work, put in a full day at the office, come home, clean the house, help Matt feed the boys when he comes in, go outside and water the yard, come in, make dinner, give Matt a break, bathe the boys, make their bedtime bottles, put them to bed, then I can either shower myself or crawl in bed. At that point, the boys will wake up between 1 and 5 times a night. Most of the time, I get up with them, not because Matt wouldn't, but because I wake up to the crying first and immediately bolt to them to see what is wrong.
I have to admit, I feel guilty about my yard-work. I feel like it is unfair that I get that time alone during the day. In fact, I feel guilty for any free time I ever get. I feel guilty for this game tonight. I feel guilty for having been a Matron of honor in a wedding. I also felt guilty that I was going to another wedding this month, but our babysitter just cancelled on us, so I probably won't be going to that. I just feel like I'm not supposed to go out and do anything since I have twins. There are not many people who can handle newborns, and therefore, I'm obligated to stay with them and maintain my home and family.

Not So Private Anymore! & Congratulations are Due!

I decided to make my blog open. I took down most of my personal information and put up comment moderation, so there will still be some safety for me here. I just got so tired of adding people's e-mail addresses. Talk about a hassle. If I get tired of this format, then I'll just switch back.
Anyway, I want to tell my good friends Steve and Kayla congratulations. They had a beautiful little girl yesterday. She is gorgeous and it is going to drive me crazy not being able to visit them. I think Matt and I might have to plan an East coast vacation pretty soon.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

3 Months Old Today!

My boys turn 3 months old today. It makes me so sad to think, "Where has the time gone?" I cannot believe that it was only 3 months ago that I was sitting in my hospital room with Matt before I got my epidural. We were sitting there and saying, "This is it! the last time it is just me and you." Thinking about it makes me want to cry. On one hand, it is so hard to remember what it was like before we were a whole family, then at the same time, I hold my little guys and wonder what happened to my teeny-tiny little newborns that came home in the bili beds.
I just can't believe it. I am in absolute awe of these little guys.
This morning, I woke up at 6 am. I went to look in at the boys and they were smiling, cooing, and jabbering at each other. I have been wanting them to interact more, and today, it really happened. I'm so proud of these little angels. I have no idea what I did to deserve these miracles. I thank God for them every day.
I just realized, I don't think Matt and I have gotten a picture with our boys since the day they were born. We will need to take pictures tonight, and I think it is important to set up the camera for a family shot. I'm going to miss all my boys today while I'm at work. I can't wait until today is over.

Monday, June 1, 2009

My BIL Met My Boys!

My BIL came into town as a surprise this weekend. He met the boys for the first time. On Saturday, we met him at the mall while I went to go pick up the boys' portraits from Olan Mills. We all went out for lunch to Mac Grill and the boys were so good. Ethan slept the whole time and James just watched us and we chit-chatted with him. Towards the end of the meal, he started working himself up, but we pulled him out of his pumpkin seat and he was fine just hanging out.

On a side note:Olan Mills re-ordered all my 10x13s because they got bent during shipping. Also, they forgot to place the order for my CD, so I'm still waiting for that, then you will get to see all their supre-cute pics!

So that evening, my BIL was at the house and we watched Bill Marr's Religulous. To be honest, I went in with low expectations. I like listening to him talk about politics, but when it comes to his views on religion, I get so upset. He is a total religious Biggot most of the time. He believes that if you are smart, then you should be an athiest and having any minute form of faith is complete idiocy. I disagree. I thought his documentary would be very cynical and self-promoting, but it wasn't. He doubts religion and he approached his documentary asking questions and making some very funny jokes. Religion isn't without humor, it is important to keep a light heart about it. I thought his movie was great, and I'm an Educated Christian.

Anyway, BIL, Matt and I watched our movie and then BIL went out with friends. The next morning, BIL came over to eat breakfast with us and see the boys again before he left for home. We got pics of BIL and the boys that I will be posting. Also, I was able to give BIL a ton of their portraits to give to Matt's parents and extended family in Idaho when BIL makes the trip next week.

I was pleased with the weekend.

Ahhhh, Finally!

Okay, I'm done posting my entire blog from that other website! And it is about time. It only took 4 days of copy and pasting!
I didn't want to lose anything but I admit, half way through, I thought about dumping it and starting from scratch. I'm glad I didn't. There was too much about the boys in there and I want to keep those memories well documented.

The Boys are Here!

My Sons Are Here
Posted Monday, March 02, 2009 11:44 PM

I'm in love with these little bundles of joy. They are just gorgeous. Ethan Samuel was born first at 2:56 pm and he is 20 inches and a quarter long, weighing in at 6lbs and 8 ounces. James Ray Thomas came a minute later at 2:57pm being 18 and a half inches long, weighing in at 6lbs 3 ounces.
I went to my Dr this morning for an appointment, Ultrasound, and NST. After the ultrasound they took me to the Dr room and a nurse took my blood pressure, and it was the first time it was above normal. It was 150/100. They called the on-call physician and he said, the cure for pre-e is having the babies, so lets take them today.
I went into the hospital and all my family was here. Matt got here from work and going home to grab the bags and the camera. Things moved along so quickly. I would say the most painful thing I had to deal with was the epidural. They couldn't get it in straight, so they kept hitting a nerve and that was just so painful. They would put it in, then take it out to start over. They tried 3 times before getting it right. I was telling it to my family, and they asked how long it took. Matt and I answered at the same time. I said 30 minutes. He said 5. I was like, are you serious?
I got my catheter, and they wheeled me back to the OR. People told me, I won't feel pain, but I'd feel pressure. To be honest, I felt nothing at all. The epidural worked wonders, so I just felt awesome, except for a teensy bit short of breath. When the boys came out, they were not crying, but I'd here them cough a little, and everyone told me they were good. I just got to see them be moved into a little bassinet right away to get clean. I just wanted to touch them so badly. When they both were out, Matt was over by their beds and said they were both perfect and I just started bawling. I don't think I've ever been so elated and filled with love and joy in my whole life.
Later in recovery, I found out their first Apgar scores were 4s and it scared me so much, but they said that their second score for Ethan was an 8, and for James, it was a perfect 10. They are my tough little men.
In recovery, I tried to nurse both boys, and man, was it hard to do as a half numb lady. Holding them and a boob was so difficult. But Ethan ate, and James was just too tired. After going to my room, it flip-flopped and James was definitely my big eater. I was told that in the nursery, Ethan peed on a nurse that my family thought was being a little rough with him. I thought that was a little cute.
Right now, the boys are in the nursery and Matt is asleep on the pullout couch. I just can't describe the kind of happiness I feel right now. My epidural and IV will come out tomorrow and I will be allowed to get up and walk tomorrow morning. I want them to have a capable Mom .
So my Boys share a Birthday with Dr Suess and they were delivered today by an OB surgeon named Dr Super. It was a magical day. Truly magical.
Here is Ethan!
Here is James!
Oh, and Ethan has dark eyes already and very dark hair. James is a little blondie with dark eyes. And I can't tell you enough how amazing they are.
Post Partum Hormones
Posted Sunday, March 08, 2009 8:54 PM
The hormones can wreck you. I have spent about 1/4th of the time since my boys' birth bawling about different things. Mostly good things. I look at them and I cry because I love them so much and I want to feed them enough and some people will say I am doing awesome with feeding and that they are looking good. Then others will say that they don't think I'm giving them enough but I don't know what more I can do. I spend 2/3rds of my whole day feeding or pumping. I just wish my boys could tell me whether they are not hungry or just too tired at times.
They both had high bili levels and came home in bili beds. Well, James did and the home nurse came to check him and I asked her to please check Ethan too, and he was in a more dangerous level than James, so now, both my boys are in bili beds and we haven't been able to hold and cuddle them except during feedings. Matt just holds the boys on each side of the bed and bounces them. I try, but I just can't get over how bad it hurts my abs from the c-section, so I end up just sitting in the floor next to them and singing to them.
Today, they told us their levels had gone way down, but from my own research, they are still in the treatable range and I worry about discontinuing photo-therapy. The pediatrician with the home nurses said it would be okay, but another Mom I am close to said her son stayed on until his range was safe. I want my babies to be safe, but I am dying to have them in my arms, so I can just kiss them and kiss them.
I cry because I love my husband in a way I never thought was possible. He takes amazing care of me and the boys and he doesn't complain at all. He is just there for us and he loves our babies more than anything in the world. I have never seen him act this way and it melts my heart to know that he loves me so much and treats these 2 little people I value above anyone, so well. I feel like he is the kind of father my boys should have. He'd do anything for them.
I am just so happy that I can't stop crying. I love my family more than anything and if terrifies me to know that I have so much to lose by having so much.

Prepare for Cuteness!
Posted Wednesday, March 11, 2009 6:29 PM
I love them soooo much. They are my pride and joy! Hormones are much more stable now:)

The Boys are 2 Weeks Old!
Posted Tuesday, March 17, 2009 6:11 PM

I can't believe how fast the time has flown by. It feels like yesterday I was laying on the table just listening to hear my baby boys. Now I spend almost every free second with them. The second I get a minute alone, all I think about is whether they are okay and I miss them. I feel like I am back to normal. I get a painful twinge in my belly if I overdo it a bit, but for the most part, I am holding up very nicely, especially for a c-section. It is major surgery, but not anywhere near as scary as I thought it would be.
I love taking pictures of my little men. They turned 2 weeks old officially yesterday. Ethan is up to 6lbs 11 oz. James is up to 6lbs 8 oz. This is big because they dipped to Ethan being 5lbs 12 oz and James at 5lbs 6 oz. My boys are eating up a storm and I feel like I am living permanently attached to a breast pump. So much fun :(. I wish I could easily hold my boys while I pumped. Matt spends a lot of time with them when I'm pumping, but when they both cry and Daddy can't get them both settled, it about breaks my heart to be pumping.
Here are some pictures of my handsome little men that I took yesterday when we got back from the Dr office. I hope you enjoy.
James
Ethan

James
Ethan


One Month Old
Posted Thursday, April 02, 2009 9:28 PM
They are one month old today!
They have rolled over (Flinging their little bodies from tummy to back). James has on multiple occasions held up his own bottle. It is a sight to see (he just kinda props it, and he hates when we move his hand). They are so smart. At their appointment Ethan went up to 8 lbs 10 oz, and James is now 8lbs 4 ozs. They are so beautiful. I would post a picture, but I've had only a couple hours of sleep in the last 5 days and I think I might try to catch some ZZZZs. Pictures to come. And please God, let them sleep so I can get an uninterrupted 2 hours. I am sacrificing pumping in this 3 hours to sleep and am risking a painfully swollen chest in hopes for the bags under my eyes to turn a lighter shade of purple.
Good night.

The Wedding
Posted Friday, April 03, 2009 2:09 PM

Oh my Gosh, I have never been to a full Catholic wedding before, much less, be the Matron of honor in one. That is crazy. I was on the alter with the bride, groom, best man and priest. It was dang tiring, but I got through all the kneeling and standing, kneeling and standing.
The wedding went well. The bride was beautiful. I was in the dress just fine. We were to go to the old court house for pictures and then go to the bride's sister's house. We got the pics, then the bride decided to go to a couple other places and it took up all the time until the reception which meant no one ate a thing from 11 am to 8 pm. AHHHH!!!!!! Her sister was ticked because she bought a ton of food for all of us and cleaned her house. Also, that was a day without finding a place to pump and my milk suffered greatly. It truly sucks. I hand expressed, but it didn't do much. I've been popping fenugreek like pez candy since. Also, I'm on reglan to increase my milk.
To be honest, I don't know if I can keep up with pumping if the reglan doesn't boost my supply by a good amount.
That is about it. I am taking pictures of the boys today. My in-laws get to see the boys for the first time today and they get here in about 2 hours. Gotta get some good clothes on.

Pic of the boys! 5 Weeks and 3 day!
Posted Saturday, April 11, 2009 3:15 PM

They look bigger every day. I just can't believe how old they are. It makes me so sad that I have to go back to work on Monday. I am going to miss them so much during the day. I could sit and stare at them all day. If you don't believe me, here is the proof.

James is sick :( But he is so big! :)
Posted Saturday, April 18, 2009 1:46 PM

James has a upper resp. virus. I took him to the doctor this morning. He was 6 lbs 3 ounces at birth, but now at a bit shy of 7 weeks, he weighs exactly 10 lbs! I can't believe it. And his brother eats more and is bigger and he was born at 6 lbs 8 ounces. He must be over 10 lbs. I'm shocked but so happy.

It has been awhile (Long Blog) and PICS
Posted Thursday, May 07, 2009 9:04 AM

I am finding that raising 2 babies and working leaves very little time for blogging :) anyway, things are going very well.
I am going to talk about a little bit of guilt. I feel guilty when people ask how I can do it. Matt and I are constantly working together to get the boys through the day. And when we are at work, my Mom and my Grandma watch the boys. I always told myself I could handle them on my own, but I didn't want to because if both boys scream, I feel terrible calming one son and just putting the other baby in a bouncy seat as I rock them with my foot. It makes me feel bad, especially since James is constantly crying when he is sat down. I feel like if I'm by myself, I can't give Ethan enough attention.
The other day, I wanted to smack one of Matt's co-workers for what she said to him. In the mornings, we have a routine that I feed, change, and dress one baby and Matt does the same with the other baby. One morning we all slept in and I had to run out of the house to catch my carpool. Matt had to feed, change and dress both babies while they are big grumps in the morning. It is hard and I felt bad for leaving him alone to do it. We are capable of watching both babies, but it is just so much easier to share the responsibilities. Well, Matt did it all, brought the boys to my Mom's house, he had spit-up on his shoulder and he got to work and said, "I'm so exhausted." A co-worker asked if the boys kept him up all night. He said no and said what happened that morning. And his co-worker said, "Oh, so you are complaining that you have to raise your children and do the job that their mother does?"
When DH told me about it, I was so angry. He has done a lot and he has really been a savior to me on so many occassions. He takes care of his kids more than a lot of fathers I've heard described. He gets up with them at night just as much as I do, he feeds them, he plays with them, and he loves them more than anyone. I was never so happy to be the person he loves third-most.
Okay, so on Tuesday, the boys got 2 month shots and I took off work to watch them. I gave my Mom and Grandma the day off and I basically told the boys, "Lets try this, Just Me and you guys." It was not too hard. I sang to them, we all danced around, they watched me exercise. I turned on Barney and I sang along with Barney too. It was just a very good day. I think I got over a huge fear that day. So at 2 months old, I got over my fear of my children. I love them more than anything in this world, but I was just so scared of not being able to take care of them the way they deserve, and even though I think they deserve the greatest things in life, I think they did good with a somewhat fearful Mom that did her best.
Anyway, that is all I can think of for now, how about some pictures:

Got Your Face! 7 Weeks
Something must have been interesting, and it wasn't the camera. 7 Weeks

Tuckered out and holding hands after a long day at the Garden 7 weeks 5 days

James is so smily! 8 weeks

I've been trying to get a picture of Ethan doing it, but 2 of James will have to work. 8 Weeks!


Blogging 2 Days in a Row! Mother's Day
Posted Friday, May 08, 2009 9:21 AM

Wow, this is starting to feel familiar again.
I am so excited about Mother's Day this year. Matt and I were going to buy a patio set and get curtains for our bedroom for my present this year. We just needed to get our tax refund back. (Stupid Turbo Tax glitched and I had to file by snail mail) Well, the refund is not back yet, so I was going to get a 'tide me over gift.'
Well, last night, DH calls on his way home from work and said he got my gift and I would need to hide away when I got home so he could bring it to the guest bedroom and put it away without me seeing. I said sure. I really like surprise gifts, so I don't snoop, and I don't want gifts early. Anyway, I hide in the dining room and DH gets the gift put away. Later while we are eating, he says, "Do you want your gift now?" I told him with it being my first Mother's Day as a Mom, I'd really rather wait until Sunday. He kept on and on. He was so excited about it. Then he gets up, I think he is going to use the restroom, but instead, he comes back with my gift. I was like, "Babe, can't it wait til Sunday." He said, "No, absolutely not, you have to open it Now."
It was a Wii Fit! I love it so much. I spent over an hour playing on it last night. I broke a sweat. I was surprised it was such a good workout. Lord knows I want to lose more weight.
So now, I won't tell you how much I weigh, but since I had the babies, I lost a total of 58lbs. I have gained 4 back though. Grrr! And I didn't gain anywhere close to 58lbs during the pregnancy. However, my pants still don't fit, Go figure! So I need to find some major motivation because I want to lose another 30 lbs. Wii only let me set a goal of 22 lbs over 3 months. I think I need to set more short term goals though. On top of that, I'm taking alli and dieting.
I am praying that one day, I will fit into my old bras. I feel like such a hooker with these big boobs. Boobs this big make all my clothes look trashy. I stopped breastfeeding, and let me tell you, once you quit breastfeeding, the girls don't stay perky. If they sagged just a little more, I wouldn't have to worry anymore about bras, I'd just tuck them into the maternity pants I'm still wearing and go about my day.
Anyway, I missed all you guys. It is nice to be in touch again.

Bumbo!
Posted Monday, May 11, 2009 8:42 AM

I wanted to get a picture of the boys all smily in their Bumbo seats yesterday, and I'll just let you see for yourselves how it turned out.
Pic #1) No Smiles

Pic #2) We are SOOOOO over the Bumbo!

Pic #3) Well, Ethan Still Likes it :)

I know there are pregnant girls who follow my blog...
Posted Monday, May 11, 2009 3:54 PM

I thought I'd post this because it was really helpful to me. There are tons of really good freezer recipes here. Not a long blog, but I thought some of you might be able to use it.
http://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/user/default.aspx?UserName=FreezerMealsBio

Happy Friday!
Posted Friday, May 15, 2009 9:31 AM

Ugh, this was the week that just would not end! I am so excited for the weekend. I've been really dying for it since Wednesday when Matt got to spend all morning with the boys. He kept calling and telling me just how alert and fun they were being. I was so jealous. He got to watch Sesame Street with them. And he kept sending me cute texts like, "The letter of the day is G. Cookie monster ate a Grape, a Guitar, and he found a Girl" and "The number of the day is 9. The Count, counted 9 bats dressed to the nines." and "Anderson Cooper is on Grouch News Network and he is interviewing Walter Kranky and Dan Rather Not."
I've been dying to spend the morning with them, since during the work week, my only contact with the boys before work is me whispering "I love you and God bless you." and blowing them kisses. I just miss them so much when I'm working. They are so much fun to hang out with, I never want to leave them.
I had been doing so great at working out lately, then I skipped on Tuesday and Wednesday. The boys just needed me too much for me to step away to exercise. Last night though, I made myself work out. I picked up James and we did hula hoop, step aerobics, and some yoga together. It was a bunch of fun looking down at him and making silly faces while I did my cardio. During the 20 minutes of step aerobics, James just fell right asleep. That was so cool. I got fit while cuddling :)
Tomorrow is a big day for us. We are going to get portraits made of the boys. I feel like we have waited so long. Now, we have taken plenty of pictures of them, and I've staged some photos like the bumbo pics with a white blanket draped over my headboard and the boys sitting on my bed, but I'm happy to be getting real sit-down portraits.
Anyway, that is about it for me. Everyone have a great weekend!

What a Night!
Posted Tuesday, May 19, 2009 9:21 AM

The boys had been sleeping in their crib since Thursday. They were doing so great. They were so content. Last night, that changed and I'm hoping that it is a fluke.
Yesterday, James had a bad day. He scream cried every second he was awake at my Mom's house yesterday. I suggested so many things to do but absolutely nothing worked. It was frustrating all around. James was making himself miserable, he could barely catch his breath. The only times he'd stop crying was when he'd cry himself to sleep out of pure exhaustion.
Matt picked him up after work and it was like he flipped a switch, Matt held him and he stopped crying, and when Matt kissed his nose, he started smiling and cooing. Can you say separation anxiety!?!
I am hoping this does not happen every day, or every Monday. He's my emotional baby who cries big fat tears when he gets upset. It is the saddest sight. Well, because he exhausted himself, we had such a hard time keeping him awake during the day. So at 2 am, he was wide awake. And he was unhappy that we were not in the mood to play. He was yelling at us for hours, which woke up Ethan, who also decided it was play time.
We were up from 2 am til I had to get ready for work at 5. We gave them another bottle and wouldn't you know it, they fell asleep. I feel so exhausted. Matt and I looked like zombies walking around the house this morning.

That's How I Like It
Posted Wednesday, May 20, 2009 7:02 AM

Yesterday was such a huge pain, but I got through it and hopefully, things will go better today. The boys got so off schedule yesterday when they woke up at 2am, so they wanted to sleep all day, and that was not going to happen. They fussed at me all evening, but I kept them awake. I like playing with them, watching them sleep all day was only acceptable a couple months ago, now, I need some bright and alert babies.
It was a productive day. I made an awesome dinner, chianti beef with veggies! Then I got done with all the dishes that were piling up. And to be honest, the house was just a wreck, so I cleaned up almost everything. I made a chore list for today of the things I didn't get done which consists of vacuuming and washing the bathtubs, so I did not to shabby yesterday. Matt spent time with the boys while he looked for jobs online. He's been peppering St. Louis with his resume. I hate where he works. They make him miserable, he doesn't like his co-workers, and they give him a really hard time when he needs to leave to pick up the kids, even though he puts in a full day. He never leaves early. Something I've always admired about my husband is that he works so hard at his job. No matter what he does, he wants to be the best. He would never slack off like I have done at times. His work will definitely lose a great employee. But I'm okay with that if it makes him happier. I want him to have a job where he doesn't absolutely dread the coming Monday.
Anyway, after chores and dinner, we all watched Dancing with the Stars and I mean all of us. the boys love that show. I guess the pretty costumes entertain them. I got the boys bathed and we gave them their bottles and they were so ready to fall asleep by 9, that I think they took their bottle while they were asleep. So with the boys sound asleep, I got a great bath. This may be TMI, but any day when I get to shave my legs is like a freakin Holiday. It just feels great. I like feeling a bit like old me.
The boys only woke up at 2 for bottles and slept well for the rest of the night, I blew them kisses on my way out this morning and they were still zonked, but breathing (Had to check).
I am so happy last night went well, I have so much to do at work, I couldn't afford another day of feeling like the walking dead.

Teething and Thinking About another Baby
Posted Tuesday, May 26, 2009 9:52 AM

Okay, so Ethan started teething and he isn't even 3 months old. For anyone who would like to say BS, look at the picture:

Crazy, huh!?!
He has been so miserable. Poor Baby. And Matt and I are getting very little sleep now, boohoo all around.
Also, Matt and I have been putting a lot of thought into the possibility of a third child. Anyway, I am on the fence on whether I really want another baby anytime soon. I think if I got pregnant, that would be my answer and I'd just get a tubal during my next c/s. Although, I've basically decided that we would not entertain the idea of another pregnancy for at least 5 more years. Then DH says this to me last night, "I really wish we could adopt right now." I was like, "Really, with 2 little babies, one which is teething, you want to adopt now?" He said "Yep, I want a little girl the same age as the boys. Then we could tell everyone that they are triplets." I kinda laughed. Then he said, "I really am serious about not waiting to adopt. I really want to have another little one around, it just seems right to have a girl too."
So my hubby wants to have triplets. I have to admit, I'm not nuts about getting a girl the same age as the boys right now. I think taking care of 2 is going to be work enough when it comes to potty training, walking, and talking. Not to mention, my Mom would have a stroke if we told her that babysitting 2 has turned into babysitting 3. I think if we wait a year and a half or 2 years, that wouldn't be so bad. Adopting a child the boy's same age, then, wouldn't be bad at all. Plus, I think if the boys thought of their sister as a triplet because of their age, it would be so sweet.
I never thought Matt would be so gung-ho to have 3 kids. But he is having so much fun with it, all except for the 'No sleep-teething' part.

Meet Ethan and James!

This Birth Story was posted on a Public Website:
James' and Ethan's Birth Story
Posted Monday, April 06, 2009 4:32 PM

"The most painful thing was the epidural. They kept hitting a nerve and tried three times before getting it in..."

The boys decide to come early

I went to my doctor the morning of March 2 for my last appointment, ultrasound, and NST before a scheduled c-section on March 5. After the ultrasound they took me to the exam room and a nurse took my blood pressure, and it was the first time it was above normal. (It was 150/100!) They called the On-Call physician and he said, "The cure for pre-eclampsia is having the babies, so let's take them today." I went into the hospital and all my family was there. Matt, my husband, got there from work after going home to grab the bags and the camera. Things moved along so quickly. I would say the most painful thing I had to deal with was the epidural. They couldn't get it in straight, so they kept hitting a nerve and it was just so painful. They told me if I felt it, to tell them right or left; and I just kept yelling, "Right, right!" They would put it in, then take it out to start over. They tried three times before getting it in. Every time they would hit that nerve, my leg would kick forward. I had no control over it. After the boys arrived, I was telling my family about it and they asked how long it took. Matt and I answered at the same time. I said 30 minutes. He said five. I was like, "Are you serious? It felt like an eternity."
Going in for the c-section I got my catheter, and they wheeled me back to the O.R. People told me, I won't feel pain, but I'd feel pressure. To be honest, I felt nothing at all. The epidural worked wonders, so I just felt awesome, except I was a teensy bit short of breath, so I was put on oxygen (which is pretty much standard). When the boys came out, they were not crying, but I'd hear them cough a little, and everyone told me they were good. I got to see them be moved into a little bassinet right away to get clean. I just wanted to touch them so badly. I kept knocking the oxygen out of my nose from keeping my neck turned to try to look at the little guys as much as possible. When they both were out, Matt was over by their beds and said they were both perfect and I just started bawling. I don't think I've ever been so elated and filled with love and joy in my whole life.
Ethan Samuel was born first at 2:56 p.m. and he was 20 and a quarter inches long, weighing in at 6lb. and 8 oz. James Ray Thomas came a minute later at 2:57 p.m., being 18 and a half inches long, and weighing in at 6lb. 3 oz. Later in recovery, I found out their first Apgar scores were 4s and it scared me so much, but they said that the second score for Ethan was an 8, and for James, it was a perfect 10. They are my tough little men.
After delivery

In recovery, I tried to nurse both boys, but man was it hard to do as a half-numb lady. Holding them and a boob was so difficult. Ethan ate, but James was just too tired. After going to my room, it flip-flopped and James was definitely my big eater. I was told that in the nursery, Ethan peed on a nurse that my family thought was being a little rough with him. I thought that was too cute. I was very lucky to resume a normal diet right after birth. The nurses were not nuts about the idea, but I told my doctor who performed the surgery that I was dying for a Burger King Chicken Sandwich with American cheese, fries, and a giant root beer float. He said, "Well I guess since you are starving, we can skip the liquid diet." The nurses were sure I'd be constipated. I wasn't, and I got my good food! While in the hospital, I saw the lactation specialist to go over what my wishes were for feeding. Since coming home, I went from exclusively wanting to breastfeed, to exclusively pumping. I felt defeated at first, but sitting with my husband and us both bottle feeding our boys is just as special if not more than fighting with my children to get the latch onto the breast. So many times, we'd all end up crying. Pumping was the way to go for us, to get the boys back to a healthy weight (they each dropped almost a pound after birth) and it was important for my sanity.
Getting used to mommyhood

I just can't describe the kind of happiness I feel right as a mommy. Sometimes, I think the hormones will get the best of me. I love holding my babies and kissing them, but if I look at the first picture we ever took of them, I burst into tears. It gets more controllable, but just thinking about my babies and how much I love them can make me cry every time. My husband and I are two different people now. The instant the boys came into the world, we stopped being just Matt and Mandy. We get pooped on, peed on, spit up on, and it doesn't matter. We are Mommy and Daddy, through and through. We're in love with these little bundles of joy. They are just gorgeous.
So, as it goes, my boys share a birthday with Dr. Seuss (March 2) and they were delivered by an OB surgeon named Dr. Super. It was a magical day; truly magical.


This Year, I Have a Baby

Crap, I Forgot that I Blogged
Posted Wednesday, January 07, 2009 2:05 PM

I knew I was forgetting to do something. I've been super busy taking down Christmas decor, going to childbirthing, rearing, and feeding classes. We've been working on the nursery, so hopefully by the end of next week, I will have a few pictures to show everyone.
Winks is able to put all 4 paws on the ground and walk around now. She doesn't hold her poor little kitty paw all funny anymore. And if you hold her, she latches on with all 4 claws, so she is showing tons of progress. She's super cute and I realized, I haven't posted a single picture of her. I need to do that sometime. I will probably take a picture tonight while Matt is holding her.
Oh, last night during breastfeeding class, Matt looked so sweet. I got tired of holding the 2 dolls while sitting in those uncomfy chairs with my big old belly in the way. He had a baby in the crook of each arm and was just lightly bouncing the dolls without thinking about it. I just had one of those moments where I looked at him and thought, "Dear Lord, this is really going to happen."
I am going to have my shower soon, and once the shower is over, Matt and I can finish up figuring out what we need, get the nursery completely set and pack our bag for the hospital. I'll be 30 weeks pregnant as of Friday. Time really has flown by. I'm just so excited to feel my little boys against my skin and smell them. That may sound so silly, but just getting to breath in around them excites me so much.
I've been preparing for them. The Nesting instinct has really kicked in. 2 nights ago, I was laying in bed and couldn't fall asleep, so I got up, cleaned the toilets, washed the bathroom mirrors and mopped the floors. After that, I felt good enough to sleep. And on that same note, my carpet looks great because I vacuum at least 2 times per week.


Picture Blog
Posted Friday, January 09, 2009 12:19 AM

I am 30 weeks as of today! Here is my picture.





And Here's Winks!






My Scary Ultrasound
Posted Monday, January 12, 2009 4:33 PM

So I had an ultrasound and Baby A is measuring at 3lbs 10 ounces. I was shocked. He is in the 54 percentile, then they moved to baby B. I thought he looked a bit smaller. They gave me his percentile at 17th. I said, could that even be right? The tech seemed really concerned. She started really grinding on my belly with that wand to see if she could get a better abdomen measurement, which she did and it brought him up to the 34% at 3lbs 6 ounces. I was so much happier. When she told me at first, I swear it felt like my heart stopped beating. They warn you about how bad it is if one gets a lot bigger than the other. I was terrified. But it is better. Then, baby B is breech.
The Dr explained that he has a very slim chance of flipping now and we should think about our options. She said she will not deliver a baby breech because of cerebral palsy risks and she said some women will choose to have the first the old fashioned way and they could try to flip the second. They said it is dangerous because of cerebral palsy and heart issues. I said, well, as sad as it makes me to have a c/s, I am not going to put either baby at risk, so I have to schedule a c/s if, by the next ultrasound, baby B hasn't flipped (which isn't likely). I have 2 dates to pick from for c/s. I get March 5th or March 12th. My due date wasn't until the 20th.
I told Matt and we thought, as long as it is a healthy choice for the babies, keep them in until the 12th, which is as long as possible. I called my Mom and told her and she agreed, then looked at her calendar and said, "No, do it the 5th, we are out of town for your sister's meet in Kentucky on the 12th." So I'd have to choose between my Mom, Dad and sister being out of town for the birth, or giving my boys one week less time to grow inside me.
Needless to say, I'm a little sad now.
I'm sure that everything will be okay, and I really do want to try for the 12th. It will put them being born 2 days before their Daddy's birthday. I couldn't imagine better gifts than them. I'm still a little worried about Baby B's measurement. It seems like every appointment, Baby B just trails a little further behind each time. I keep thinking, as long as there isn't a huge gap between them, that they have to be okay. I swear, the first thing I thought after I knew that both babies were okay was, "Dangit Ethan, share with your little brother." I really hope that if I have to have the c/s, that my Mom will stay with me. I just really want her to be with me that day. We are very close.


Stumped!
Posted Wednesday, January 14, 2009 7:28 AM

Well, pregnancy brain has been attacking me lately. I can't think of what to write, so I'm just going to c and p a board post about my darn brain.
I know I am not this stupid. On Sunday, I ended up doing the math wrong on my lunch bill and tipping the waitress about 40%. Then, on my way home, I forgot my low fuel light came on and I ran out of gas on the side of the highway. Then for dinner, we were going to have chili. I grabbed the wrong can. I don't eat the chili with beans, and that is the one I made. I just feel like I cannot be trusted. My husband told me that he worries about me now because I'm acting without common sense. He said I should probably not drive around much by myself. I think he has a point, because last night, I went to Hobby Lobby and spent about an hour wondering around and bought nothing, Not even the letters I went there for. I ended up going to wal-mart, doubling back and then buying the letters.
Pregnancy has made me such a dingbat.

Life With Multiples
Posted Friday, January 16, 2009 9:49 AM

In my multiples class last night, they described a c-section in graphic detail. I hadn't eaten all day, the room felt hot and cramped, and I almost passed out. Matt caught me before I fell out of my chair. I swear though, I pass out at the best places. Before pregnancy, I had a margarita lanyard for breakfast and passed out front row at a HURT concert and got pulled over the front rail by a cute bodyguard and watched the show from backstage. Then, I passed out at the Dr. office on the u/s table. I was in good hands. Then last night, I go down right into DH's arms in the hospital with a RN on my right side. My body knows the perfect time to take involuntary naps.

52 Weeks Pregnant
Posted Monday, January 19, 2009 1:09 PM

Hey everybody, I'm 52 weeks pregnant. How backwards does that sound!?! Seriously though, I'm measuring at 52 weeks and I'm getting to the "Get these babies out of me" point. I love them though. I get kicked with more gusto now which tells me that my little men are getting some fat on them which I am great with. I have another Ultrasound on Wednesday to see how big my boys have gotten in one week. I'm hoping we have broken the 4lb mark.
The discomfort in pregnancy is sometimes enough, coupled with emotions that come in extreme highs and lows, to make me cry. It isn't that carrying a baby hurts. Or that carrying 2 babies hurts, it is just so exhausting. When you are experiencing round ligament pain, Braxton Hicks contractions that tighten your tummy to the point where you lose your breath, and sciatic nerve pains shooting down your legs, you just reach a point where laying in a warm bath can't help as much. I find laying in bed with pillows shoved all around me to the point I feel that I'm floating on a cloud while I sob feels unbelievably good. The stress relief with a good cry is perfect on some days.
The vivid nightmares I've had lately are enough to terrify anyone. I dream about delivering too early. I dream about seeing my sons only through incubators in the NICU. I dream about having my boys older and losing them in random places like pumpkin patches, craft fairs, or crowded malls. I dream that I may not make it through my c/s. I dream that I don't make it to my c/s and James is born breech. It is just so scary to think of the endless list of things that can go wrong, but having supportive people surrounding me helps so much with the anxieties.
The list of fun things that I would never trade in a million years have been far and few between and the misery of sickness and worry is virtually constant, but there is something truly amazing about the whole deal. I have loved calling these boys by their names. I love that my family is excited and I absolutely love seeing people get excited about my little guys. I get a huge kick out of knowing that Ethan and James aren't here yet, but so many people are head over heals in love with them. I can't get enough of the heart-to-heart talks that Matt and I have together. Not all conversations are sparkly and happy, such as the "Who gets custody in the event of our deaths, getting our affairs in order" discussions. But even then, talking about that with Matt brings me comfort in knowing that my children will be well provided for if something ever happens to me and their Daddy. But because I'm listing the fun stuff, the nursery is soooooo much fun. I love trying to get it together. It is stressful, causes miniature fueds between Matt and I, and it seems like nothing is ever as easy as it should be, but it is great to see it all come together which was nothing like what I originally envisioned.
With all of that said, Matt and I met a worker at Lowes the other night. He asked when I was due and I said March 20th with twin boys. He has twin boys himself who are under 2. He was talking about them and the stories were so sweet. Then we just started talking about the frequency of multiples and the weird stories that come out, such as the bi-racial couple in England who have 2 sets of fraternal twins, in both sets, one child came out looking dark skinned and the other was fair skinned. We then started discussing how once you have twins, you are more likely to have them again. Since that converstaion, for some reason I can't explain, Matt and I have been talking about how cool it would be to have more twins after this set. I just don't want to jump towards a permanent birth control yet. I just don't know if I want this to be the last time I carry one of mine and Matt's children inside me.
I still love the idea of adoption, but it is the funniest little sensation to actually feel a teensy foot against the inside of my tummy. Whenever I feel it happen, I just tickle back at my belly and say "tickle toes, tickle toes" Sometimes they will play with me, sometimes I just think they want to know if their Mommy is paying attention.


I Needed This
Posted Tuesday, January 27, 2009 3:27 PM

Yesterday was my sister's 12th birthday. The whole family went to PF Changs and had dinner and it was so good. The weather was bad. The snow in St. Louis had highways shut down all over the place. Matt and I got home safe, but we were passing accidents right and left and the 10 lane highway was being driven as a 4 laner. It reminded me of what my Grandpa used to say. During really bad weather, my grandpa would drive slow and every car that would pass, he'd say out loud, "We'll see ya later, in a ditch!"
When we got home, the neighbors were outside playing in the snow. They had their dogs out and I think a lot of them were big puppies playing in the first accumulation they had ever seen. It was pretty funny. After just a few minutes, Matt wanted me in from the cold and I turned on the fireplace and sat in front of the fire while Matt made us Hot Chocolate. I logged onto work and wrote a note to my supervisor that I was snowed in and that I would have to work from home the next day. Matt did the same. Then we watched Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. We got to sleep in up until we logged into work today. I love that we've both been safe and sound in our home today watching the snow. It has been a really nice relaxing day.
Also, I ate a bowl of orange sherbet today and the boys have been going nuts. I have just sat back and watched my belly dance around like crazy. And I promise that I will be posting nursery pictures as of this weekend.


I feel like I have nothing to say lately
Posted Thursday, January 29, 2009 2:52 PM

I just don't have much to say, but I like to post updates to let you all know that I am not in labor :) I miss all the ladies over here.
I've been debating between having the babies on March 5th or 12th. I've been dealing with finishing the nursery details. There is just so much going on and with all the snow, I've been lazy. Just posting to let everyone know that Ethan and James are still gestating nicely and nursery pics are coming soon!


Double Ear Infection/Lists
Posted Thursday, February 05, 2009 7:16 AM

I really, really, really hoped I'd never have to deal with one of these again. They are the absolute worst. I was hoping I would make it to my shower this weekend. I had just kept praying that I could make it past 34 weeks so I could just get all the stuff so I know what we need to finish the nursery. I knew I'd be miserably tired, but I didn't think I'd have ear infections. These truly suck. Hopefully I am getting them so the boys won't have to, wishful thinking? Lets hope!
Today is my day of lists. I am doing nothing but putting lists together. I have 4 lists I've already been working on this morning since I woke up at 5 am. These 4 lists are, the chore list for the house. I figure if I am in the hospital for 4 days, I want Matt to know what regular chores need done. Basically, I'm just making it a checklist so when he is rushing from work, to the house, to the hospital to sleep with me and the boys, I want him to be able to get things done quickly.
The second list is really more of a nesting list. This list includes all the little things I want done to the house before I go into labor or reach my planned c/section. This list is like spring cleaning. Such as, washing the windows, cleaning the oven, scrubbing every nook in the whole house and arranging all the closets.
Another list I have is the babies room list. It has everything I need to do for them. It has all the things I need to wash, all the things that need hung on the wall. It has everything listed that needs installed and assembled.
My last list is what all I can remember to put in my hospital bag. I have been going down so many people's suggestions and I'm modifying it to Matt and I. Some of the things people bring are crazy, and some of the things people forget to bring is just plain stupid, but I want to make sure I am prepared. I intend to help the best I can with these lists, but I feel like if I make them, even if I can't do it all, Matt is going to be able to use them if I suddenly get put on bedrest.


Realize You Haven't Seen Me In Awhile Too!
Posted Thursday, February 05, 2009 9:23 AM

Here are some pictures of me at exactly 33 weeks, tomorrow I will be 34!
I've come a long way!






My Shower is Tomorrow
Posted Friday, February 06, 2009 2:16 PM


I am so excited! I can't wait to see all the awesome stuff people buy my little boys. DH has just a few last things to do tonight in the boys room and I will have the pictures I promised you all last week of our cute little nursery. I figure I will just wait until it is crammed full of shower gifts to take all the great pictures.
I'm officially 34 weeks pregnant. I remember touring the hospital I'm delivering at with a pediatrician and him telling me, with twins, if you hit 35 weeks, you are most likely garunteed to not have to spend time in the NICU. I will be so excited if we can make it to that point. I told DH, the scariest thing right now in my mind is the thought of my babies needing tubes and IVs hooked up to their fragile little bodies. I just want for them to be treated like all the other singleton babies who are born big and strong. The NICU is by far my biggest worry.
I just feel like my little guys are getting so big. Their kicks are strong. Also, on the 9th, I get to schedule the c/section. I'm thinking March 5th is the way to go, and I can't remember if I told you about some of the research that settled me on this date.
In a normal singleton pregnancy, the time to have a full term baby without danger of intrauterine growth restriction is between 37 and 41 weeks. It is during this time when the lungs gain that final maturity where they can breath well on their own. With twins, this time frame is sooner, between 36 and 38 weeks. They say that IUGR can cause a baby to not grow properly. This increases the risk of stillbirths and the possibiliy of babies losing weight while in the womb. I was reading that it can therefore be dangerous to carry twins past 38 weeks because in many ways, it is the same as a woman carrying one baby past 42 weeks. I was shocked and it is making the earlier date sound far more appealing than what I thought before. Oh, and in triplets, they are supposed to be born even earlier. The book I was reading was so interesting. It said that because twins and higher order multiples are "full term" earlier, their lungs and organs gain that final maturation earlier. This is why a premie multiple is much more likely to survive being born earlier than a singleton. It is natures way of making up the difference.

These Boys are getting Big :)
Posted Monday, February 09, 2009 3:33 PM

I went in for a Growth Ultrasound today and the boys are measuring 6 lbs and 5 lbs 12 ounces. My sweet little boys are getting so big. I just have to keep them in a few more weeks and all will be great.
I will post some pictures from my shower a little bit later with the pics of the nursery. I don't have access to the photos right now. Everything is going great. I found out today, Matt and I are the furthest along with our twins than any of the other couples from our Life With Multiples Class. 2 couples have gone before us and the 1 couple that was ahead of us went earlier and we have now surpassed them.
I was told today that I have a cervix of steel. If that is the case, then I'm so happy that I am having a c-section. Hehe. I also had an NST today and the boys tested great and got me out fast. I loved the NST, it was so relaxing.

Still Pregnant!
Posted Tuesday, February 17, 2009 6:03 AM

Dang this is getting difficult. I swear, I just chant, March 5th, March 5th, March 5th over and over in my head all day. I'm getting so irritable lately, I just feel like I would have a much better demeanor if I could not be as big as a house. I keep hitting my belly on my countertops and running into doors. I have no idea how big I am anymore. I can't judge it.
I'm just done, so done. and I am saying this at 35 weeks and 4 days along. That is so good for twins. 35 was our big milestone because with twins, 35 will usually mean no NICU at all. And their lungs make the surfactant earlier than singletons and would be able to breathe well on their own by this time since most twins are born by 36 weeks.
I've been praying for comfort. My house is clean and ready, boys room is finished, laundry is done, hung up and folded. I have my lists completed and hung on the fridge, my bag is packed, and I'm ready to go!

Nursery Will Be finished After Boys Get Here
Posted Thursday, February 19, 2009 7:34 PM

I don't have any of my wall art up yet. We have a ton of white picture frames. Also, we have to hang the valance. I want the stuff on the walls so badly, but I don't think it will happen until after the boys are here. My husband is a really good artist and he is going to sketch a portrait of me holding the boys. I can't wait until he does it.



Hello, and Yes, Still Pregnant
Posted Wednesday, February 25, 2009 7:39 AM

I have my c-section scheduled for March 5th at noon Central. I am so excited. My Dr said she thought both babies were really good size and she worried about trying to leave them in longer. She said the worst that she sees happening is them maybe needing oxygen for a day or so, but because they will be 37 weeks and 6 days along, she said, most likely not. She said it is a much better alternative to them possibly starting to lose weight in the womb. So A+ for me, for doing my research!
This means, I'm pregnant now for less that 10 more days and I am just so ready to meet the boys. I had the cutest, crazy dream last night. I kept dreaming that I got them home from the hospital and Matt said, "Okay honey, Gotta go to work" then I tried to change thier diapers while sitting in my living room floor. Their onsies wouldn't unsnap and I was freaking out. Then, when I finally got one laying down, the other 4 day old baby got up and started walking away and I ran after him. Then the other one got up and walked away. I was thinking, 'My Lord, my children are so advanced!'
Anyway, I am ready for the boys to get here anytime now!

Qs!
Posted Friday, February 27, 2009 10:08 AM

This may be my last blog before giving birth since my contractions are around 10 minutes apart, but that has been since yesterday afternoon, so who knows how long this will last.

1. WAS YOUR PREGNANCY PLANNED? Nope, not at all. If it would have happened a month earlier, I would have said yes, but these boys were a complete surprise.
2. WERE YOU MARRIED AT THE TIME? Yes, for 9 months.
3. WHAT WERE YOUR REACTIONS? I was just stunned. I could not believe my eyes. Matt was very happy.
4. WAS ABORTION AN OPTION FOR YOU? No way! I wanted these boys to stick. I was afraid of losing one, didn't think I'd gain 2.
5. HOW OLD WERE YOU? 24
6. HOW DID YOU FIND OUT YOU WERE PREGNANT? I felt sick. I threw up a couple times. Then I realized I was a bit late. Man, I was stunned!
7. WHO DID YOU TELL FIRST? I told the internet.
8. DID YOU WANT TO FIND OUT THE SEX? My boys! I couldn't wait to find out.
9. DUE DATE? Due on March 20th, planned c-section for March 5th. Painful contractions as of yesterday, so who knows, these boys might surprise me today.
10. DID YOU HAVE MORNING SICKNESS? Yes, and I still have it at 37 weeks! Are you jealous?.
11. WHAT DID YOU CRAVE? I have loved pizza. I also like fruity popsicles.
12.WHAT IRRITATED YOU? What doesn't irritate the pregnant lady?
13. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CHILD'S SEX? My Boys!
14. DID YOU WISH YOU HAD THE OPPOSITE SEX OF WHAT YOU WERE GETTING? I really wanted a baby girl, and now, I don't even have them here and life just seems incomplete without my boys. I would still like a girl. Maybe we will try again, but we will definitely be adopting too.
15. HOW MANY POUNDS DID YOU GAIN THROUGHOUT THE PREGNANCY? 35
16. DID YOU HAVE A BABY SHOWER? Yes. I had a very nice work shower, then I had a mini friend shower at a bar with margaritas : ( Good planning ladies), and I had the main one with all my family and close friends.

I'll let you know if any progress happens with my contractions :)

Not Unpregnant yet
Posted Saturday, February 28, 2009 11:46 PM

Having some irregular contractions right now. Waiting and waiting. Come on little boys, any time!
Just thought I'd let you know.